Misc data and adventures of a Tayopa treasure hunter

[truckinbutch]

Birdman ,
I sympathise with ya , buddy . I had a nasty old rip like that to milk at one time .
Put the bucket under her one morning and she kicked me . Tied her leg to the stall . She then kicked me with the other leg . Tied it fast and tried again . She wrapped her old crappy tail around the back of
my neck and the side of my face .
I stood up on the stool and tied her tail to the ceiling . That's when everything happened all at once .
My overall strap broke and they dropped to my ankles just as my wife walked through the barn door !
>
>
I never did completely convince that woman that I was just trying to milk the damn cow ..................

 

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[poorhunter78]

Birdman ,
I sympathise with ya , buddy . I had a nasty old rip like that to milk at one time .
Put the bucket under her one morning and she kicked me . Tied her leg to the stall . She then kicked me with the other leg . Tied it fast and tried again . She wrapped her old crappy tail around the back of
my neck and the side of my face .
I stood up on the stool and tied her tail to the ceiling . That's when everything happened all at once .
My overall strap broke and they dropped to my ankles just as my wife walked through the barn door !
>
>
I never did completely convince that woman that I was just trying to milk the damn cow ..................

I ain't gonna say 1 word Butch.... Sorry coudnt hold it....

 

[birdman]

Butch, now thats funny !

 

[Goodyguy]

Birdman ,
I sympathise with ya , buddy . I had a nasty old rip like that to milk at one time .
Put the bucket under her one morning and she kicked me . Tied her leg to the stall . She then kicked me with the other leg . Tied it fast and tried again . She wrapped her old crappy tail around the back of
my neck and the side of my face .
I stood up on the stool and tied her tail to the ceiling . That's when everything happened all at once .
My overall strap broke and they dropped to my ankles just as my wife walked through the barn door !
>
>
I never did completely convince that woman that I was just trying to milk the damn cow ..................

Now dat rat dere was funny, I don't care who ya are.

 

[Real de Tayopa Tropical Tramp]

OK OK gals and guys, notice, he 'claims' that he was tying up the movable appendages just to milk Her ? and needed a stool?? just to tie up her tail Hmmmm Why didn't he just tie a brick to the tail and learn to duck?

I hope that oro doesn't see that post and start confessing also , if so ,Beth will kill both of us.

need for my nerves.

Incidentally, truckin, you never mentioned the many times a freshly soaked tail is used to plop you in the face? Bird man was honest in his wonderful story.

Sheehs still blushing.

Don Jose de La Mancha

p.s. I hope that our innocent Unicorn didn't read that.

 

[poorhunter78]

When I was Little, I remember out front of our place the neighbors had a fence that ran the border of our place...Just 1 strand of barbed wire it was very consistantly about 3' off the ground...I was out playing with our Dog, The fence ran through right behind the dog's box.. The neighbors had a white mountain Goat, Supposed to be half wild half tamed... Their was a spot where the ground was low right behind the dog's box...And That goat was there and came under the fence.. I ran to the front porch and in through the door...

That Ram was fightin with our Dog, He was a huge German Shepherd... After the Ram had enuff of the dog he came over to the front porch... My Dad RIP, Went outside to try and get him back across the fence..Now this SOB was meaner then Heck he and my Dad went round and round on the porch.. It kept trying to Get him Ramming that head of Bone into Everything... Dad was Slick, That goat couldn't get him, Then one of the post that supports the Porch got Broke... Dad Ran over and Jumped on the car, He had a 2x4 don't know where he got it..."Now you gotta understand this ram was determined to Hurt my Dad, Maybe even kill him"...

Anyway This Ram was butting the side of the car.. Rearing up trying to climb up to get dad...He took that 2x4 and kept clubbing that goat... My dad was fighting for his life.... I remember the goats whole face was red with blood... Dad clubbed him enuff that he was messed up bad...That gave him the break he needed to come in the house and get a gun to remove this thing... As he went down through the yard to where it was....It was regaining itself until he then Put it down....

I don't care much for goats, When you see something like this It leaves a scar... I have eyes in the back of my head around any goat nowadays...


Poorhunter

 

[mdog]

Hey Poorhunter,

I'll bet Butch's cow has eyes in the back of her head too. She could be the only cow in the world on anti-anxiety medication.

Great stories.

 

[mrs.oroblanco]

First - I'm not so sure you could convince me that you were just milking the cow, either - and I've hand-milked hundreds of times

When you tie a cow's leg, it has to be pulled away, so that its not under her, and tails get tied to the kicking leg, so, if she kicks, she pulls her own tail - and then you milk on the side that's tied up. so..................

We've had some of those, though, and most first-calf heifer are like that. I wonder - was it spring time? During the first green grass, a cow can get poop everywhere from under her, to all the way across the barn.

We had a wild-assed cow - first calf. She started out a good milking cow, the first few days after she calved. Then, one day, the neighbor's kid came running into the barn, hollering for all he was worth, and the cow just about jumped out of her skin, and tried to climb through the stanchion. Got her settled down.

However, the next morning, we went to milk her, Roy washed her - everything normal - then he started to milk - in a split second, she kicked him, straight in the middle of his face - sent him flying all the way to the other side of the barn, instant bloody nose. We ended up tying her leg to one of the barn supports, but she never got better - so.............down the road she went.

Speaking of cows and spring grass and the "shoots" that come from it, we had a cow that got mastitis. After calling the vet, we had meds that we had to give her twice a day. She was a hurting little cow, so she was ansy and a little kicky. If you take a cows tail, and hold it up over her back, she cannot do a full blown kick. My son was there that time, and Roy asked George (my son), to hold the cows tail while we took care of her. He did so. Then, all of a sudden, we realized she was humping her back a bit - a sure sign that she is getting ready to go to the bathroom. Roy yelled at George to let go of her tail and get out of the way. My son looked at us (as we were grabbing the meds), for a second, a little confused - but, too late. The cow let go, just as my son was saying "what?", and the shooting squirts got all over him, including in that open mouth - followed directly by him gagging and throwing up.

It is difficult to look concerned when you are laughing so hard that you are crying!!!!!!!!!!

Beth

 

[truckinbutch]

Beth and Don Jose ,
I have dealt with farm critters for the last 59 years and still do . I can assure you that I was just trying to MILK THE DAMN COW !
Beth ,
Ya should have been a witness when I was helping Daddy castrate a litter of feeder pigs that had scours . Me holding them by 4 legs upside down while Daddy used the knife ............ When one squirted a stream right in his mouth at the first cut we took a 'timeout'.
When he got done yorking and got a fresh chew in his jaw he took additional time to strap my legs for having such a good aim ....... Like I had done that on purpose just to get a strappin Me laughin may have sumpin to do with that ......................

 

[Unicorn]

I did read it DON JOSE lol and had me a good ole laugh.


'U'

 

[Real de Tayopa Tropical Tramp]

ladies and gentlemen, err hi Broads and Jocks, sheesh , blushing . Beth I have the coke bottle and camera ready when you are, with Oro's permission of course, and unicorn attending. sooooo.

Uicorn that IS when a male can blandly check the country, a pro can clean his fingernails at the same time, or trucker can work on a can of Budweiser. Eat yer hearts out gals.

However the most unusual experience that I have in this necessary factor of life, was when I was on that backpacking trip down the Mexican west coast before there were any roads, just foot and horse trails.

We had come to this little village 'Aguila'. It was small with a huge pile of timber / logs in the plaza / square. We dropped our packs looking for a place to sleep for the night. Unfortunately I had a #2 signal ready but when I asked where to go, he grunted and pointed to the pile of logs in the square ?

No way was I going to use them during the daylight, so suffering horrible pangs, and squirming like a sexy latina singer, or Beth getting back into her cover - alls, at -60 below. so I finally managed to hold off till dark. I headed out to the logs, practically crawling, found myself a nice stool about 4 ft off of the ground to be safe from snakes, and settled down to the long delayed business.

Just as I was starting to have success, a cold wet nose goosed me with a loud grunt, a piggie demanding that I hurry up. sheesh it had precisely the opposite effect and it was 24 more hours before I ----.

sheehs the cost of being modest and shy .

Don Jose de La Mancha

 

[truckinbutch]

Caught 'short' in an underground mine one shift . Ran into a crosscut , dumped hat/light/belt/battery
on rib spall while hauling down coveralls/longjohns/ect and hunkering . Just as the plan started coming together the light started changing .
Yup! Light and hat rolled under me with perfect timing . Having a hat full of crap was no longer a euphemism .

 

[Real de Tayopa Tropical Tramp]

err truckin are you referring to the hat on the floor or while wearing It? just curious my friend.

Don Jose de La Mancha

 

[coazon de oro]

Hey Goodyguy, where are those hip waders?

You thought it was bad, now it got worse! Now we've got guys and gals "hunkering" letting everything go!

I'll just watch my step. I was going to throw a "log" ( no pun intended ) into the fire, but that wood pile smells really bad.

 

[mrs.oroblanco]

truckinbutch,

Sounds like you and I are not too far apart in age (and some experiences).

I've been on the business end of the knife, castrating pigs, but, luckily - never got "shot" at, but, I have seen them do it right after we've let them go. Scared the $hit out of them, I guess.

Jose,

Watch them little piggies - they'll take your personal equipment with them - nasty little creatures!! Explain how you lost THEM while you were out.


Beth

 

[poorhunter78]

Butch, I guess there comes a time when we Have to Tell on ourselves... Does that help Absolve us of Sins... If So... Here Yuh Go...

I had a calf that I bottle raised, And nurtured like a puppy to show him some day... He was as tame as a Dog... He knew who brought the grain bucket... When the time came he was loaded and we took him to the fair... He was in a stull made up of expanded fence wire... They were setup in different sizes and dimensions for the different livestock... His Pen was about 8' x 8' so he did not have a lot of room for moving around... We were there 5 days so in between being pinned up and short strolls around the corral where we were to show our animals he had gotten feisty a few times... The morning of the showing I was in the stull with him, Brushing him down, I knelt down and was cleaning his hooves... As I got done cleaning them, I popped the cap off the shoe polish to Shine up his hooves... As I got the back 2 done I moved up to the front he was gettin antsy... So I got down to polish the first front hoof and that 400 lb calf reared up and tried to mount me... He knocked me over, As I got up $%@&^$^$&%*% He was looking at me, I drew my fist tight and hit him right tween the eyes as hard as I could swing... He just looked at me like Duh That didn't hurt... I hurt my hand pretty good, Just glad nobody else saw what happened... I think we ended up about middle of the pack out of 20 some calves....

Poorhunter

 

[old marine]

Hello all while we are on the livestock stories Iwas about 10 had seen a cowboy movie watched them ropejavascript:void(0);
those cows thought I can do that it was winter time cold went to the barn couldn;t find a rope found some grass strings tied them together got in the loft threw out some hay as cows were eating made my noose lowered it down got it over a cows horns thout now i pulled it tight you know frozen cow tracks are very hard as she took off pulled me out landed on my back man it takes awhile to get your breath back must have layed there 10 min. brused and hurt a couple days that ended my wrangling days hh old marine

 

[mrs.oroblanco]

Wow, oldmarine,

That can be dangerous - you were actually lucky. Had a friend who did something similar, but, he made the BIG mistake of wrapping the rope around his hand for a better grip - he had gloves on.

Well, the gloves didn't do too much, except to serve as a place to keep his fingers when that son-of-a-beach took off. He lost the top part of 4 of his fingers.

Poorhunter,

I've had a stud horse mount my mare while I was riding out of the pasture. Man, two huge black and blue marks on my back from his hooves.

I've also had the "cow" mounting problem - and I think it was because, for a long time, we had our cows bred by AI - those cows in heat KNEW when that technician walked into the barn to inseminate them. They would moo lovingly when he came in. But one cow, she never "showed" like the others, but, when she came in season, after you'd milk her and let her go to leave the barn, she would turn around and hump something - other cows - and me and Roy if we weren't careful. Luckily, we'd know it was going to happen, because, during that time, she would stop and stare at her intended "target" - just long enough to get out of her way. We would have gotten rid of her, but, as long as she was kept bred, there were no problems. Plus, she bred easily (wasn't hard to tell when), and she had good calves and lots of milk with high butterfat - and, she would also be a nurse cow - but, boy, those 3-4 months when she was not bred were dangerous!!

Beth

 

[truckinbutch]

Beth ,
Studs can be a pain and a pleasure . Had a Cajun Creek palomino quarter horse stud that was my buddy . Loved to drink beer and would walk through fire for me . Always told me which ladies crowding around really wanted to get to know me better .
Caught my left arm under his foreleg as he was mounting a mare one day . Broke it and wouldn't dismount until he made the '8 second whistle'.

 

[mrs.oroblanco]

Truckinbutch,

All I can say about that is: OUCH!!

I got hurt when I was a kid - horse fell, I fell under it, smashed my left kneecap into the nearest rock - and she scrambled to try and get off me, but, the danged tapederos that my dad insisted I use had my foot tangled, so I got dragged a tad. But, believe it or not - she was one of the very best horses I ever had. She was mine - and she knew it (rather I was hers, I think)- but she did have fire in her belly.

Its our best animals that we take chances with. (well, at least me). Back in 2002, I got a kick square in the gut by a Percheron that wouldn't kick if her life depended on it. She would lay down, and I would sit on the ground and do her feet. A wild (as in feral) cat came scrambling across the yard and actually landed on her, she jumped up, scared, with scrambling feet, and I got her foot in the gut. (a short hospital trip after that one) - but, I had no business being where I couldn't get out of the way. But, I knew she wouldn't kick. (so I took a chance I shouldn't have).

My hubby had his shin broken when two horses that would never kick a human, got into a spat, where the gelding kicked the mare - only Roy was a closer shot than the mare, and he got the brunt of the kick. (and, since they were in harness, hubby was right in the "sweet spot" of the kick.)

Beth


PS Here is one of our studs - (Percheron) - he would do anything for me, but, he was a one-person horse. Made great babies, though.

If this picture is against the rules, (I don't think so) sorry - just remove it.