Doing a favor, loosing a friend!

B

Beachkid23

Silver Member
Oct 26, 2013
4,917
4,883
fort myers fl
Primary Interest:
All Treasure Hunting
A guy I have been friends with for over 10 yrs is ticked at me for selling his moms bracelet for him. Here's what happened. I sold the 14 karat gold bracelet for him. It's sold online for $700. The buyer after they received it said it didn't fit and returned it three days after I paid him. We went over the eBay fees before and he understood what he would get. I got it back and relisted it for $800. Now he's upset that I have it at $100 more then before. Moral of the story, don't sell for friends.
 

Amazon Forum Fav 👍

Minelab PRO-FIND 35 Waterproof Pinpointer Metal Detector for Experts with Tone ID & Adjustable Sensitivity - Grab it through Amazon!
Yeah Thats the number one on my list.It never works out, and to me its restrictive because you cant budge on anything. Sorry to hear about you losing a friend, if they really are though they will get over it.As far as the extra 100 you have to recoup the loss, the extra fees youll pay on that when it sells again,and so on. Good luck hope it works out for you.
 

Nickleanddime said:
Yeah Thats the number one on my list.It never works out, and to me its restrictive because you cant budge on anything. Sorry to hear about you losing a friend, if they really are though they will get over it.As far as the extra 100 you have to recoup the loss, the extra fees youll pay on that when it sells again,and so on. Good luck hope it works out for you.
Click to expand...


No, there's no extra fee because in that situation you cancel the transaction... so he is plenty justified to be upset for a friend making a hundred if that wasn't part of the deal.
 

it was free shipping. With the insurance and sig it was close to $20 in shipping I believe. Also gold at the time was $200 higher.
 

I would have to side with your friend. Yes, you paid him, but you NEVER purchased the bracelet outright from him. Therefore, when it sold and came back, this was never a sale. You can take your commission yes, but it is on YOU not him to sell it and fully complete the sale, which you did not do. He is completely entitled to be mad. He could just give you the money you gave him in the first place for the bracelet back. It is not yours, you are just a vessel he hired to sell the item. YOU do not own the item.

This closely resembles shops that consign and take a percentage off of what the original price was, just to sell it for THEIR share and they do not look out for the "partner" they consigned with.

What you did is against business ethics. It would be much different if you paid him say 600 bucks for it, then listed it at 800, but thats not the case, you still owe him your FULL service.

That is just my 2 cents.
 

This just made me think of quite a few years back I sold a gold coin for a friend, paid him the money, and then the thing goes missing and I took the loss. Ahhh... a little more is coming back.... I decided to save him a little bit on the shipping and didn't insure it, and that's why I took the loss. I wasn't too happy with myself over that one, saving $10 that wasn't even my money and then it costing me $150. I don't think I ever mentioned the coin was lost and I paid the price.
 

More or less on topic. Friends? Don't sell them anything. I had a 1972 Ford Pickup with close to 325K miles on it. I took very good care with the service but it looked like an old dug up coin. The seats was more duct tape than cloth or leather. Believe in 1986 I bought a spanking new Jeep truck. Moved the junker out of the garage and into the woods planning on using it for yard fill dirt, prospecting, ect.

My neighbor, my very good and loyal friend, we've done each other 100's of favors over the past years or so. He's the only person I actually loaned a car to when his was being repaired from a fallen tree. I get nervous when my wife needs my truck for hauling "her" items.

But to the don't sell anything to friends. One day he borrowed my junker to haul some landscaping RR ties. He backed it back in the woods and asked if I would sell him the truck? Sure, why not? What will you pay me for it? He said $5 dollars. I said give me the money and get your truck out of my woods. No paperwork changed hands as I had had a cardboard Farm Use tag on it. He drove it home. Across the road.

And then the complaints started. Every meeting there after included a list of the $5 dollar trucks problems. On and on it went. Must have made 50 offers to give him back his $5.00. This went on so long I started avoiding him. Seems every time I've had a business dealing with a friend or relative it was more or less the same story. Deal only with strangers.
 

I scrapped some gold for my mother in law about a year ago. Told her I didnt want a dime. Did it strictly as a favor and so that she wouldnt get ripped off taking it to some shady "we buy gold" place on her own.

IMO, its best not to "do business" with friends or family. It typically just turns into a problem.
 

Friends and family do not realize the old saying.

"There is no room for hurt feelings in business"

That is what makes it hard to do it, everyone expects things to go well, or you to do more for them just because you know them. I just think in the situation that is presented here, that as a seller doing this on basically a consignment type set up, you should never, NEVER give the person even the slightest ability to assume or feel that they are being ripped off. I honestly would just sell it back to him for the 700, and just end it. This case, he has no ownership so it can really screw you if you dont handle it right.
 

Remind him that she was already paid for the item and you are out $600ish plus shipping until the item sells. Also remind him of the time and energy spent listing the item, twice, shipping the item, twice, and dealing with the return.

Also remind him that often things dont sell for what you ask - so he is getting upset over something that hasnt actually occured yet. Maybe you will get $600 this time since gold has gone down???

Also - what does the mother think? If she is ok with you trying to make $75 bucks to cover all the time and effort you put into it then he needs to mind his own business!
 

It sounds to me like you sold something that was not yours..
 

Last edited:
His mom could care less. I have $600 in a bracelet I don't want. It had been listed over a month and took it off and I relisted it and he checked my site and saw it. I'm not trying to rip him off, I would like my $ out of it though. I'm sure he doesn't want to buy it back either. It's been at $800 bin or best offer. I did take it down again and will relist on my wife's site next week. But I'm not sure how he can't understand I don't want to be $600 into the thing. I guess this was stupid on my end. Lesson learned!
 

Beachkid23 said:
His mom could care less. I have $600 in a bracelet I don't want. It had been listed over a month and took it off and I relisted it and he checked my site and saw it. I'm not trying to rip him off, I would like my $ out of it though. I'm sure he doesn't want to buy it back either. It's been at $800 bin or best offer. I did take it down again and will relist on my wife's site next week. But I'm not sure how he can't understand I don't want to be $600 into the thing. I guess this was stupid on my end. Lesson learned!
Click to expand...



When you received it back the best thing would have been to tell your friend the deal fell through, and you would need the money back, and would relist.... or he could let go making it your bracelet to do what you want with, and maybe list higher. (I would have told him I would list higher) So the problem here is you made that choice for him, and the stupid part is if you would have just given him the option it is very true he would have almost certainly wanted to keep the cash, which was very likely spent anyway.... and then you could do what you want, even make a little extra if you held out.

If my friends know anything about me they know I'm very direct... don't think I'm a pr1ck, but I definitely don't make things a guessing game... and that is why I would not have had this issue. Even if it was my detecting bud who I have hunted with for 13 years I would have done exactly what I wrote... told him I would need the money back, or it was mine to do what I want with. Obviously there is a 2nd option which is to continue to sell it for him and figure it all out when it's said and done, but personally I don't like things like this to go on forever. I don't have any problem at all dealing with friends or family for anything because everything is talked out and each person knows what to expect... which is another point, both of you should have prepared for a deal falling through and how to handle it. So at the end of the day, as the seller you should have made better choices to not be in this situation and it's SO STUPID to lose a friend over what, maybe $50-$100, or what's perceived to be that on his end. I just couldn't live in that world and would no question write off $100 for a friend and not think twice. It reminds me of my drunken 20s when a friend would avoid me for the $10 he owed me! ...and what's worse was it was an issue for me too! I'm very glad to be well beyond that.
 

Good point, I see what your saying. I guess I figured that was what would happen anyways and it not be a big deal. About reselling it. Thanks for the advice.
 

I sell a piece or two for someone every now and then. I wait until I communicate with the buyer, after the purchase, to make sure they are satisfied before anyone gets paid. This usually takes place within the week after proof of delivery.
 

Beachkid23 said:
View attachment 920494
Click to expand...
You'd think the forum admins. would have fixed the photo issue by now. It's been like what, 3 days? I guess they are too bust deleting entire forums versus worrying about photos not posting correctly. Priorities you know.

Try copy & paste for photos works for me.
17460.8651_santa.jpg
Santa%2527s+arrest.jpg
 

You must log in or register to reply here.

all this for 40$!!

⬅️ Previous Thread

Watch out for bed bugs in electronics!

Next Thread ➡️

Top Member Reactions

Users who are viewing this thread

Total: 2 (members: 0, guests: 2)
Metal Detecting Stuff

Latest Discussions

Back
Top