You Know Youre Getting Old When....

[AU24K]

You Know You're Getting Old When....

Hello Friends!
Here's a fun little thread to provide humor on aging.
Be imaginative and make us all enjoy, through humor, the fine art of getting old!

You know that you're getting old when:

You hire neighborhood kids to dig your metal detector signals 'cause your knees would like to disagree with such activity.

"Junk Mail" is predominantly from AARP.

A nickel or a dime had great buying power.

Older people start to call you, "Sir."

You remember what it meant to be an "American."

Oh, and get the "Hell off my lawn, buy a freakin' belt to hold your drawers up and turn that baseball cap around like it should be, ya damn kids!"

Always my best wishes,
Scott

 

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[Frankn]

You get shocked when you look at price tag or buy gas.

Your arms seam to be to short to read.

Your glasses prescription seams to change each year.

You wonder what you came into the room to get.

You don't like to drive at night any more.

You have trouble changing that exhaust pipe that was easy last time.

You enjoy rolling over and going back to sleep in the morning instead of jumping out of bed when you wake.

You start looking for THAT LAST BIG CACHE.

 

[packerbacker]

You can name all 7 of Disney's dwarfs but you can't name all of your grandkids.

 

[mrmackin]

The range on your detector you call an "iffy" signal gets wider and wider.....

 

[packerbacker]

Almost everything you do or say has become "Politically incorrect".............whatever THAT means.

 

[packerbacker]

What you used to call flirting is now sexual harrassment.

 

[packerbacker]

You ask where the points are when giving your car a tuneup.

 

[Chadeaux]

Almost everything you do or say has become "Politically incorrect".............whatever THAT means.

Politically Incorrect - 1) A wuss's phrase to denegrate anyone stating the absolute truth about another or (more often) the wuss. 2) Any fact that exposes what a deadbeat the wuss you're talking about really is. 3) Anything that requires a wuss to be responsible for their actions.

 

[FarmerChick]

You know you are getting old when..........

you answer this question and others know they are old too when they know exactly what you mean when you post your answer

 

[GPS53]

You know you are old when you are looking for the rewind button on the DVD player.

 

[FarmerChick]

You know you are old when you say to your kid, 'in my day...'

 

[rockhound]

You are old when you can remember that mail and newspapers used to be delivered by a mailman and paperboy. You are really old if you can remember that milk used to be deliverd by a milkman. rockhound

 

[AU24K]

I love y'alls replies!

I know I'm getting old when I can't hear you too well on the phone or I have to turn the TV up to watch Matlock, but the current "music" is too loud at ANY volume.

Also, when I wake up to "Snap, Crackle and Pop" and it ain't breakfast.


Best,
Scott

 

[AU24K]

If you find yourself making more and more lists, You might be gettin' old.

If you freak-out because you can't find a specific list, You might be gettin' old.

Best,
Scott

 

[Frankn]

AU24K, think you are getting old, wait until you can't use the phone and need the captioning on the TV. Frank

 

[AU24K]

Frankn my Friend,

I've had this new-fangled cell phone for about 5 years when one day recently I was going to make a call and the screen showed a pair of feet. MY feet. Moving!
Somehow, certain buttons were puhed and, well....
Dang! My PHONE takes pictures!

We are all past Dick Tracy's wrist-watch phone/communication abilities---we are now about to trump Buck Rogers...

Sheesh(?)

Never too old to be young,

Scott

PS. You need to quit lookin' in my window...Yes, I have added "closed captioning" to my TV viewing. LOL!
(Took me over an hour to figure out because of the interruptions caused by those kids cutting across the lawn...)

 

[Chadeaux]

You could always get a cold steel blow gun from Cold Steel Knives. They have "stun" darts. You could start tagging them after you knock them out. Bright yellow spray paint across the forehead would work so you could identify the ones you had already tagged and give them a bit more Umph when you shoot, or maybe know when to go for a head or groin shot.

 

[AU24K]

My life diminishes by the day, (as does yours) and on my final day I'd like tobacco, strong whisky and the company of family and friends.
You are invited...


Best,
Scott

 

[Chadeaux]

Don't like Tobacco, can't drink anymore, so I'll take a double helping of friends and family.

Be well.

 

[AU24K]

You could always get a cold steel blow gun from Cold Steel Knives. They have "stun" darts. You could start tagging them after you knock them out. Bright yellow spray paint across the forehead would work so you could identify the ones you had already tagged and give them a bit more Umph when you shoot, or maybe know when to go for a head or groin shot.

Hmmm...You just might have something here...
Damned loveable kids....(Parental discipline including spankings goes a long way towards providing guidance....)

That brings up a whole 'nother subject of discipline. Did you ever get a spanking? What for?

I can tell stories of my many spankigs while I was growing up for hours.
(I really was a good kid, I was just a victim of circumstances...)



Scott