HEADLINES FROM THE YEAR: 2059

[onfire]

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California.

White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica. No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!

Last Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2060.


Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Abortion clinics now available in every High School in United States.

Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.


Massachusetts executes last remainingconservative.

Supreme Court rules any punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

A Couple Finally Had Sexual Harmony, they had simultaneous Headaches.

Average height of NBA players is now nine feet seven inches with only 5 illegitimate children.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2060.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines.

I Love This Country!

It's The Government That Scares Me!
Stop organized crime.
Re-elect no one.
Live Simply...Love Generously...Care Deeply...Speak Kindly...Leave The Rest To God.

 

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[Rebel - KGC]

WOW! Yer PSYCHIC!

 

[onfire]

WOW! Yer PSYCHIC!

25$$$ please I'll except Pay Pal

 

[GMD52]

Good deal, payments in the mail, will get there sometime on a Wednesday!

 

[jerseyben]

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California.

White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica. No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!

Last Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2060.


Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Abortion clinics now available in every High School in United States.

Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.


Massachusetts executes last remainingconservative.

Supreme Court rules any punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

A Couple Finally Had Sexual Harmony, they had simultaneous Headaches.

Average height of NBA players is now nine feet seven inches with only 5 illegitimate children.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2060.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines.

I Love This Country!

It's The Government That Scares Me!
Stop organized crime.
Re-elect no one.
Live Simply...Love Generously...Care Deeply...Speak Kindly...Leave The Rest To God.

Other races besides whites speak English, no?

Also, I think there may be a few people you forgot to offend in that post.

 

[onfire]

Other races besides whites speak English, no?

Also, I think there may be a few people you forgot to offend in that post.

Truth hurts I'm offended I offended you. Were you talking about the remark about the fat people. sorry

 

[Peyton Manning]

don't be upset with onfire, I find it hard to believe he thought those up himself. where did you find them really?

 

[onfire]

don't be upset with onfire, I find it hard to believe he thought those up himself. where did you find them really?

Washington Post.

 

[austin]

Ya left us(Texas)out. We are already Texico, don't have to wait till 2059.

 

[Backbacon]

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California.

White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica. No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!

Last Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2060.


Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Abortion clinics now available in every High School in United States.

Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.


Massachusetts executes last remainingconservative.

Supreme Court rules any punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

A Couple Finally Had Sexual Harmony, they had simultaneous Headaches.

Average height of NBA players is now nine feet seven inches with only 5 illegitimate children.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2060.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines.

I Love This Country!

It's The Government That Scares Me!
Stop organized crime.
Re-elect no one.
Live Simply...Love Generously...Care Deeply...Speak Kindly...Leave The Rest To God.

I would like some clarification in order to better understand what you posted. Are you just referring to the NBA players of African descent or are you referring to all the different nationalities that play the game. Does what you stated in this well thought out thread include the short Caucasian guys like Steve Nash? We wouldn't want to think that your post could be portrayed as racist in any way, as well as already blatantly offensive towards women. So would you please clarify to everyone as to what your statement is all about. I'm not talking about the usual ambiguous response that we're all used to hearing from you. How about a well thought out response to a truly valid question? It's what Stocky would want you to do.

 

[Backbacon]

 

[Treasure_Hunter]

Ozone created by electric cars now killing millions in the seventh largest country in the world, Mexifornia, formerly known as California.

White minorities still trying to have English recognized as Mexifornia's third language.

Spotted Owl plague threatens northwestern United States crops and livestock.

Baby conceived naturally! Scientists stumped.

Couple petitions court to reinstate heterosexual marriage.

Iran still closed off; physicists estimate it will take at least 10 more years before radioactivity decreases to safe levels.

France pleads for global help after being taken over by Jamaica. No other country comes forward to help the beleaguered nation!

Last Castro finally dies at age 112; Cuban cigars can now be imported legally, but President Chelsea Clinton has banned all smoking.

George Z. Bush says he will run for President in 2060.


Postal Service raises price of first class stamp to $17.89 and reduces mail delivery to Wednesdays only.

85-year $75.8 billion study: Diet and exercise is the key to weight loss.

Average weight of Americans drops to 250 lbs.

Global cooling blamed for citrus crop failure for third consecutive year in Mexifornia and Floruba.

Japanese scientists have created a camera with such a fast shutter speed they now can photograph a woman with her mouth shut.

Abortion clinics now available in every High School in United States.

Senate still blocking drilling in ANWR even though gas is selling for 4532 Pesos per liter and gas stations are only open on Tuesdays and Fridays.


Massachusetts executes last remainingconservative.

Supreme Court rules any punishment of criminals violates their civil rights.

A Couple Finally Had Sexual Harmony, they had simultaneous Headaches.

Average height of NBA players is now nine feet seven inches with only 5 illegitimate children.

New federal law requires that all nail clippers, screwdrivers, fly swatters and rolled-up newspapers must be registered by January 2060.

IRS sets lowest tax rate at 75 percent.

Floruba voters still having trouble with voting machines.

I Love This Country!

It's The Government That Scares Me!
Stop organized crime.
Re-elect no one.
Live Simply...Love Generously...Care Deeply...Speak Kindly...Leave The Rest To God.

There is nothing racist in this post, stop trying to turn it into one.... It is just a piece of satire humor....It even pokes fun at Florida, I am a Florida native and my wife is Asian...

 

[Backbacon]

There is nothing racist in this post, stop trying to turn it into one.... It is just a piece of satire humor....It even pokes fun at Florida, I am a Florida native and my wife is Asian...

If this type of crap is what you think of as humor then why haven't you moved it into the Comedy Central forum then? If this is how you feel women should be regarded on this forum then please start a thread about how Tnet and it's Mods condone this type of a statement towards women.

 

[Backbacon]

There is the remote possibility that myself along with everyone else who feels the same way about his post could be wrong.

 

[spartacus53]

I have to agree this is pretty funny, after all, most will already be dead by that time, so why worry

And if it is indeed a piece of sarcasm, or other humor and not intentionally malicious, then it was just posted in the wrong forum. It shows that we don't have to wait until 2059, because English isn't understood in America in 2013, as clearly stated in line #2, because we don't have a grasp of it now

 

[Treasure_Hunter]

If this type of crap is what you think of as humor then why haven't you moved it into the Comedy Central forum then? If this is how you feel women should be regarded on this forum then please start a thread about how Tnet and it's Mods condone this type of a statement towards women.

BB, I can count the number of times this thread has been reported on one finger, 1 time by 1 member and a man at that even our lady moderator has not complained about it.....

The last time I looked you were not a mod here so you let us worry about moderating the forums...

 

[Backbacon]

BB, I can count the number of times this thread has been reported on one finger, 1 time by 1 member and a man at that even our lady moderator has not complained about it.....

The last time I looked you were not a mod here so you let us worry about moderating the forums...

Words to live by, I guess? At least one can now see the true transparency of this thread as it still remains in this current (everything else) forum.

 

[Treasure_Hunter]

BB, it is not really to your advantage to keep challenging the mods..... I am not the only moderator here, there are 5 of us here plus the admins, all of us read the post reports....It is nothing but satire with humor...........

 

[Backbacon]

BB, it is not really to your advantage to keep challenging the mods..... I am not the only moderator here, there are 5 of us here plus the admins, all of us read the post reports....It is nothing but satire with humor...........

If this thread is aimed at satire and humor.... I will then admit that I am totally wrong with my previous statements. I'm not challenging the Mods, just stating the clearly obvious that has been displayed in this thread, IMO. If this thread is a true playful type of humor then why is this thread still in the (Everything Else) forum?

 

[jeff of pa]

If this thread is aimed at satire and humor.... I will then admit that I am totally wrong with my previous statements. I'm not challenging the Mods, just stating the clearly obvious that has been displayed in this thread, IMO. If this thread is a true playful type of humor then why is this thread still in the (Everything Else) forum?

Because I thought Onfire traveled to the Future in his Time machine & was reporting back.

Seriously though, Sometimes I just read & forget to look where posts are located