Goodyguy
Gold Member
- Mar 10, 2007
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I received this in an e-mail.
Yesterday I was at my local Target buying a large bag of
Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Sheriff, the Wonder Dog,
and was in the checkout line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant?
So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no,
I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably
shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time,
but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward
with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that
the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina
nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry.
The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to
try it again.
(I have to mention here that practically everyone in line
was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care
because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to
sniff an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart
attack he was laughing so hard.
Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the
time in the world to think of crazy things to say.
Anonymous-
Yesterday I was at my local Target buying a large bag of
Purina dog chow for my loyal pet, Sheriff, the Wonder Dog,
and was in the checkout line when a woman behind me asked if I had a dog.
What did she think I had, an elephant?
So since I'm retired and have little to do, on impulse I told her that no,
I didn't have a dog, I was starting the Purina Diet again. I added that I probably
shouldn't, because I ended up in the hospital last time,
but that I'd lost 50 pounds before I awakened in an intensive care ward
with tubes coming out of most of my orifices and IVs in both arms.
I told her that it was essentially a perfect diet and that
the way that it works is to load your pants pockets with Purina
nuggets and simply eat one or two every time you feel hungry.
The food is nutritionally complete so it works well and I was going to
try it again.
(I have to mention here that practically everyone in line
was now enthralled with my story.)
Horrified, she asked if I ended up in intensive care
because the dog food poisoned me. I told her no, I stepped off a curb to
sniff an Irish Setter's butt and a car hit us both.
I thought the guy behind her was going to have a heart
attack he was laughing so hard.
Better watch what you ask retired people. They have all the
time in the world to think of crazy things to say.
Anonymous-
