Ray S S
Silver Member
The following are real statements found on insurance claim forms. Drivers
attempted to summerize the details of an acident succinctly.
***Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree
I don't have.
***I thought my window was down, but I found it was up when I put my
head through it.
***The other car collided with mine without giving warning of it's intentions.
***The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before
I hit him.
***I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law
and headed over the embankment.
***In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
***I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I
reached an intersection a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision, and I
did not see the other car.
***The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of
it's way when it struck the front end.
***I was thrown from the car as it left the road. I was later found in
the ditch by some stray cows.
***The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car
with a big mouth.
***I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel at
the wheel and had an accident.
***I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my
universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.
***As I approached the intersection, a stop sign suddenly appeared in a
place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to
stop in time to avoid the accident. To avoid hitting the bumper of
the car in front, I struck the pedrestrian.
***My car was legally parked as I backed into the other vehicle.
***An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
***I told the police that I was not injured, but upon removing my
hat, found that I had a fractured skull.
***I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side
of the curb when I struck him.
***The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.
**************************************
Ray
attempted to summerize the details of an acident succinctly.
***Coming home I drove into the wrong house and collided with a tree
I don't have.
***I thought my window was down, but I found it was up when I put my
head through it.
***The other car collided with mine without giving warning of it's intentions.
***The guy was all over the road. I had to swerve a number of times before
I hit him.
***I pulled away from the side of the road, glanced at my mother-in-law
and headed over the embankment.
***In my attempt to kill a fly, I drove into a telephone pole.
***I had been shopping for plants all day and was on my way home. As I
reached an intersection a hedge sprang up obscuring my vision, and I
did not see the other car.
***The telephone pole was approaching. I was attempting to swerve out of
it's way when it struck the front end.
***I was thrown from the car as it left the road. I was later found in
the ditch by some stray cows.
***The indirect cause of the accident was a little guy in a small car
with a big mouth.
***I had been driving for 40 years when I fell asleep at the wheel at
the wheel and had an accident.
***I was on my way to the doctor with rear end trouble when my
universal joint gave way causing me to have an accident.
***As I approached the intersection, a stop sign suddenly appeared in a
place where no stop sign had ever appeared before. I was unable to
stop in time to avoid the accident. To avoid hitting the bumper of
the car in front, I struck the pedrestrian.
***My car was legally parked as I backed into the other vehicle.
***An invisible car came out of nowhere, struck my car and vanished.
***I told the police that I was not injured, but upon removing my
hat, found that I had a fractured skull.
***I was sure the old fellow would never make it to the other side
of the curb when I struck him.
***The pedestrian had no idea which direction to run, so I ran over him.
**************************************
Ray
. Especially the "kill a fly" one. I get a little wild with my driving sometimes trying to kill flying varmints 
